I’ve been thinking a lot about vulnerability today. I recently found myself in a situation where I had to decide if I was willing to risk being vulnerable in order to ask for something I wanted. This ask required that I share a very messy part of myself. And I had to face down, was this risk worth possible rejection? Was honoring myself and my needs worth putting myself in this uncomfortable position? In the end, I decided yes.
Did I get what I wanted? No…. and Yes.
I didn’t get the specific thing I was asking for. But I did get many other things I hadn’t counted on. For one, I honored myself. Big win for self-respect and self-love.
Circumstance didn’t allow for the actual thing I wanted to manifest, but I gained trust with those I revealed my desires to. I found out that they wanted me to have what I wanted and were there to support me however they could… mess and all.
All this boils down to connection. Choosing to be vulnerable allowed me to connect deeper with myself and with others.
Brene Brown defines vulnerability as such:
“Uncertainty, risk and emotional exposure. It’s the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy and creativity.”
Holy smokes. While within the definition is risk, it seems way more risky to hold back and miss out on the vitals of why we are alive. Nonetheless, the process of surrendering to our vulnerability can rock us to our core.
All this leads me back to my favorite topic.
What’s that you ask?
It’s selling, silly! Geez… I thought you knew me by now.
Selling is not some separate beast from the rest of life. If we want to feel unified, aligned, whole.. then the call is to embrace all we do from the same place.
The conventional model of selling does not entertain the idea of being vulnerable.
Far from it.
Like oceans away. Planets. Light years. Infinity. How far can you get away from something? That’s how far most selling teachings are from the idea of being vulnerable within the exchange.
Why is everyone looking so hard for the perfect formula to follow to make sales?
(And everyone selling this!)
We don’t want risk. We don’t want uncertainty. We don’t want to emotionally expose ourselves.
Who the hell wants to do that?
But what is the cost of this?
According to Brene…. love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity.
And let me tell you, as someone who has had thousands of thousands of selling conversations… selling CAN be a gateway to ALL THAT.
This is why I fell in love with it!!!
And the key to it all… vulnerability.
Karen Young from “Hey Sigmund” says this:
“Vulnerability is key to connection because it is the courage to be open to another human. It’s saying the words that are pressing from the inside. It’s opening yourself up to somebody getting closer. It’s giving without expectation or agenda. And receiving with an open heart.”
So I ask of you this:
What about the work you do is pressing from the inside of you to share?
What do you see as possible and want to scream from mountaintops about?
Why do you care so much?
Get right up in there and share it all…
Share in honor of the need in you to manifest the world you dream of.
A world in which we all belong.
Drop every formula you ever learned and listen to what your heart says.
You may just get far more then you ask for.
This is what I found. When I sell from this spirit, not only do the bills get paid… but far greater then this is the gift of knowing I am not alone, that in our hearts we all want the same thing. And it is available to us right here and now when we look at each other in the eyes and honor it. Every encounter, including a sales exchange, can be an invitation into greater connection and belonging.
Go for it!
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